Here I was bracing for yet another indefinite period of pain and uncertainty. Exhausted and anxiety-ridden, for the first time I seriously considered actually accepting my doctor’s offer of happy-pills (or mood stabilisers or whatever… I’ve always been terrified of the stuff). Not as a permanent solution, but to…
Tag: Reflections
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I survived 2020, and all I got was this lousy blog post
Happy new year, dear readers! What a year it’s been. We’ve very palpably been in it together, haven’t we? Do you have anyting, personally, to be proud of? Anything you’ve learned? Most of my endeavours (acquiring a motorcycle driver’s licence, finish editing my book, learning to do a hand-stand, to…
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Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Manouvering
I wasn’t going to write about this publicly until I succeeded. Until I had a result to show the world, a jubilant proof that persistence and hard work pays off in the end. Now that I’ve failed, that seems kind of stupid. Wouldn’t it just feed the social media thing…
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Glädjen sitter i kroppen
Tänk vilken glädje som kan bubbla upp, helt spontant en tisdagkväll på väg hem från jobbet. Trots cykelpendling tolv kilometer enkel väg, bryter ett stort leende fram, som solen mellan molnen. Trots regn och vind och oändligt många trapphus och att jag behövde jobba över i mer än en timme.…
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The shape of inspiration
I think I felt a spark of inspiration today. Perhaps it was the light of evening sky against a foreground of trees. Perhaps it was the coldness of the waterfall shocking me awake. Perhaps it was the softness of skin half-hidden beneath last year’s fallen leaves. Whatever shape it took,…
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Violent thoughts
How often do you think about violence? I do it often. The only thing I spend more time thinking about is probably sex. I never talk about it. Sometimes I write about it. I am not a violent person and I do not self-harm. I’m about as pacifist as hippies…
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Summing up a decade
The 2010’s have gone by, and I have been blogging (more or less regularly) throughout the entire time. In the same space of time, I’ve lived out my twenties. Ten years is a staggering amount of time, yet it has flown by faster than pigs with wings. I’ve grown and…
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There Will Be No Intermission
Dear Amanda. I don’t know if you’ll ever read this post, but here goes anyway: Thank you, Amanda Fucking Palmer. I had the great fortune of seeing your show yesterday in Copenhagen. There was indeed no intermission, and as far as my feelings are concerned, there won’t be one for…
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A right to be present
Hello, autumn. Come here and let me love you. I’ve always had a hard time expressing my feelings for summer. Perhaps it is the sheer bounty of it: the light, the growing things, the overwhelming, undeniable multitude of life. Now the air is cooling. The darkness of night is returning.…
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To love a mountain
Hello again. View from “lunch” break at 2 am. Back in the mountains again over the summer, as the fates would have it. Hello, midnight sun. Hello waterfalls and rain-wet birch forests. Hello, lake of coldness. Hello, breathtaking vistas causing my heart to vibrate. It is like returning to a lover.…