from threads
I see you hanging and I feel myself
hanging on for dear life
from threads around my bones
from the trees through my skin
holding me up
the only thing keeping me
here
keeping me
from sinking completely into the ground
I need
something to hold onto
a thread to follow
a network of arteries against a canvas of sky
to map the red threads within
a map to follow
to see in which direction my body is moving
is it leaning into the wind
or scattered by it
fragments of imagination
figments of flesh
blown by the wind
into strange new formations
on the other side of the world
so scatter me
or let me follow
show me a piece of ground to sink my body into
before the cruel wind tears it to pieces
take me close
close to home
until I can taste the future
and not have it turn to ashes in my mouth
it’s hard to swallow
the choice between digging where I stand
praying for heaven to attain me
or running like hell
chasing the idea of home around the world
closer to home
or closer to heaven
for some lucky bastards
home and heaven has always been the same place
but I’m far from home
and further from heaven
hanging from threads too weak
to support these heavy bones
and this flesh
aching to defy the shape it was born into
aching to draw a breath
which is not a reminder of a cage
for the bird inside my chest
if instead
of coughing up feathers when nobody’s looking
I wear raven black
let darkness seep through the cracks
in my skin
though it hurts
when my darkness flows into somebody’s eyes
if I push towards the sky
if I pull myself up by my own tender nerves
could I endure you leaving me hanging
from threads
waiting
for
hands against skin
trees against sky
for the most beautiful words in the world
you are not alone
waiting
with
hands pressed against trees
skin stretched across the sky
all glowing with stars
you are not alone
and not everything hurts
Love and pain,
Winterdragon
